Kyouya's Baby
by Kinda.Sorta.Insane
Summary: “Tamaki, this is Sally. And she thinks I’m pregnant.”


WARNING- this fanfiction may cause extreme brain damage and/or laughter. (It did both to me.)

"Mother!" I held back a sigh as I turned to face Tamaki.

"What?" I allowed a slightly annoyed tone to creep into my voice.

"You've got to come over! I got a new commoner's game! It's really fun!" of course it is. Everything is fun to that bonehead.

" Can't. I promised Father I'd be home early." When would I ever do that?

" Ok… Maybe tomorrow then!" He skipped off to find someone else, probably Haruhi, to play with him. I continued walking towards my limo when someone tugged my sleeve.

"Mister? Why'd that guy over there just call you Mother?" I glanced down at the little girl. She looked about five years old. Her brown hair is pulled to the sides into two little pigtails and her big eyes are a shocking shade of green.

"I'm not really sure." Her brow furrows. Probably in confusion.

"Are you going to have a baby?" I take that back. She's probably three.

"No, little girl. Boy can't have children."

"Is it a girl or a boy?" Oh great.

"I'm not having a baby." I tell her through gritted teeth.

"Why aren't you fat? Is it because your baby is small? Or did you already have your baby?"

I did NOT have a baby." I struggled to keep my voice in check. It would NOT look good to yell at a little girl.

"Wait! Then who's the daddy? Is it that man you were talking to? Awww! I bet you guy's baby is really cut!" she seemed pleased at the thought.

"Look. Maybe you should go find your mom." Then, I can go home.

"And how come you're not smiling? Moms always smile. Or… Maybe you aren't the mom! That other guy seemed really happy…"

"He's isn't a mom." This girl is really annoying.

"So you are the mom! How come your baby isn't here? Oh! He's probably at day care. Can I go with you to pick him up?"

"What's your name?" This will make it easier to get rid of her.

"Sally."

"Come on, Sally. Let's go find Tamaki." I offer my hand, which she takes.

"Ok. Then are we going to get your baby?"

"Sure. Whatever." Anything to keep her quiet.

"Oh! Mother! I thought you we- who's this? You're a cutie." You know who says as he rushes over.

"This is Sally. And she thinks I'm pregnant."

"You're having a baby?! How come you didn't tell me?! Is it a boy or a girl?" Not him too.

"I'M NOT HAVING A BABY!" I glare at him.

"I think he's in denial." Tamaki whispers to Sally.

"Yeah." She nods in agreement.

"I'm going home." I mutter and walk away.

** With Tamaki **

"Sally! There you are! I was worried." A woman that looks like Sally rushes up.

"I was just talking to this nice man." She points at Tamaki.

"It's ok, madam. She was no trouble at all." He smiles.

"Thank you, Sir." She picks up Sally and walks away.

** The Next Day, At School **

As I walk through the halls I hear people whispering and I feel the weight of their stares. What the hell is going on?

"Uh… Hi Kyouya." A girl with dark brown hair and eyes says.

"Hello?" what does she want? She glances down at my stomach and hurries away.

Students and teachers alike repeat this strange action all throughout the day. What in the world? I think this has something to do with Tamaki. I haven't seen him all day…

** After School in Music Room Three **

"Kyouya sempai?" Haruhi sounds nervous. Weird.

"I… uh.. someone told me that… you're…"

"I'm what?"

"Pregnant?" she cringes.

"I'm what now?" she cringes again.

"Well… Hikaru and Kaoru told me that Tamaki told them that both you and a little girl told him that you're having a child. And… I noticed that you've been eating extremely healthy lately."

"You do know I'm a guy right?' I raise an eyebrow.

"Yeah. But…"

"I'M NOT HAVING A BABY! And if you ever bring up this topic again I will raise your debt. Do I make myself clear?" I give her my best death glare.

"Yes." She runs off to get changed.

"Kyouya! How long 'till our baby is born?" I turn around slowly, glare in place.

"Tamaki. Listen carefully. I. AM. NOT. PREGNANT." His eyes widen.

"Oh. I'm sorry," Finally. "I didn't know you were still in denial." He runs off to talk to the other host club members. Someone taps my shoulder and I turn around slowly with my eyes closed.

"HOW MANY TIMES DO I HAVE TO TELL YOU?! I'M NOT PREGNANT!"

"Um… Ok?" Uh oh. I know that voice. I open my eyes to see, none other than, my dad. He looks at me like he's never seen me before.

"Oh. Father. Didn't know you were stopping by." This is bad.

Sooo. Did you like it? Did you hate it? Should I do a sequel? I won't know unless you review. And I won't do a sequel until someone reviews telling me to do so.

Check out my other fanfictions if you like twincest or Kaoru/Haruhi.


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